i'm growing...

Well... it's the middle of winter and I'm in the last stretch of this baby-growing adventure. Two months and a few days or so, and then ... (head shakes) ... It's kind of hard to believe; hard to believe what has already happened, the physical presence of this little animal growing inside me, and hard to believe what is to come...

I'm really overwhelmed by the support and love we've received. Starting with our families, then the tremendous love we received from Claire, Vanessa, and Sailor while we stayed with them in Olympia. We slept every night in Sailor's Star Wars bed, shared meals, struggles, dreams... it was really bittersweet leaving the Northwest. I miss that cool, wet air, my grandma Ruth, my grandpa Colvin, aunt Becky & uncle Bruce hugs, laughs with aunt Cathy, cousins, and raspberries.

We made the long drive home with only a few bumps along the way and the first evening at home I sank into the bath after seeing the freshly painted walls in our downstairs (thanks to Shannon, Dan, and others). My eyes poured buckets. Our house-mates, my family, the Magnuson's, City Sprouts folk, other mama's (my sister, Josephine, Angie, Liz, Vanessa, Lauren) and the two ladies that have been my sounding board this whole pregnancy (Shelley and Kristin) ... I am really thankful for all these folks and their huge hearts.

I'm making a nest at our home (the Hoo Hallow) with house-mates Shannon, Dan, Brian, and Tyler. We're on the look out for another house-mate to fill the fourth room upstairs and awaiting a visit from James who lived with us a bit this summer. The last few weeks we've had holiday visitors -- Melissa, Jayme, Jairus -- and our house feels full, like a belly after a very satisfying meal.

Also, I've been working on organizing a completely new venture with Tyler and others. I can't quite reveal all the details, but it involves growing food, our neighborhood, and a lot of potential...

There have been many difficult moments too. Probably the most frustrating experience so far has been applying and waiting for Medicaid. Working with DHHS is not easy in this state. A lot has been revealed to me about how backwards things are, on many levels, in many areas. I still have positive feelings about my choice to do pre-natal care at a hospital, but I'm still wondering if I'd make the same choice next time. We'll see. In times of frustration... hand holding, back-rubs, tears, a family dinner, or a dance by candlelight in the dining room helps to bring me back to what is real...

we're still growing...